Blech

I forced myself to do some yoga tonight, 30 minutes to be exact. I am so exhausted. I couldnt even relax because i just wanted it to end so i could go to sleep. Regardless I have maintained and there is always tomorrow. Good night!!!


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21 day challenge: week 1

Im a week into my 21 day personal yoga challenge. On average I probably do about 30 minutes every day. Since I am currently traveling, I have been using several different yoga videos. I have found some really good videos but they definitely don't replace going to the studio. I doubt I have lost any weight because I like to eat way too much especially when I travel. Im sort of a foodie. Regardless of losing weight, I feel 100 times better every day. Yoga has helped me to really get the blood flowing to my muscles, which in turn relieves my aches and pains. I have a better outlook on life and I can finally think clearly through situations before I react ( well maybe not all situations but thats just a a part of who I am). I have never been too keen on any daily ritual except sleep but I cling to yoga like some do to the bible. It has really been a spiritual experience, it makes me want to be a better person inside and out.

I have decided that 21 day challenges could be really great for jump starting a healthier lifestyle. Therefore, every few weeks I am going to give myself a new health challenge. I really began doing yoga almost every other day for a couple of weeks before my 21 day commitment but I felt the need for a real lifestyle commitment. In addition , I chose to drop most beverages, besides the ever addicting mocha frappe, for water due to its many health benefits. My next personal challenge is going to be organic/ whole food eating for 21 days. I wont be starting til next week but I have been doing a lot of research in the meantime. It will be extremely difficult since I travel to work and require a lot of fast, easy to prepare, frozen foods for 3 nights a week. Fortunately, I am pretty convinced that Amy's frozen foods will help me through those difficult times. In addition, it will require a tremendous amount of planning since I prefer to buy local produce and meats. I feel a little overwhelmed by the idea but I believe it is a change I have been wanting to make for a long time.

Yoga Yoga blah blah blah

So I have been obsessed with finding a really good yoga blog. In my search I have read numerous posts about how horrible it is that people are turning yoga into an exercise regimen. That yoga has become too commercialized and has been ruined by the masses. Although, I'm new to yoga I sort of agree. As you might have already read, I get severely irritated by instructors claiming that they are teaching you yoga when clearly they don't even know yoga. I'm not going to lie, I hope yoga facilitates me on my quest for a better body. Yet, Im not willing to participate in a complete mockery of this ancient art form.

Which brings me to my latest practice, YOGALOSOPHY by Mandy Ingber. Yogalosophy is the Jennifer Aniston/ celebrity touted workout that gets you results. I'll be honest Jennifer Aniston is hot and I want a body like hers. No, its not really yoga but it doesn't claim to be. It is a combination of traditional moves, yoga moves, and most importantly a connection to breathe. I will admit that when I first put it in the player I thought " Oh goodness, another one?!". I felt like Mandy's voice just might get on my nerves instead of leading me down a road of relaxation. I was so wrong!! Although she is not a meditation guru, she speaks honestly as if she is your best girlfriend sitting in your living room. She tends to poke fun of the workout a little, making it actually light and fun! Although, this will not become my every day practice I will definitely use the video to supplement my strength building.

Which causes me to ask... what is wrong with doing yoga for exercise? Isn't yoga about mind and body? I know that I need increased strength in order to improve my postures and have the ability to move on to harder postures. So what is wrong with me trying to become stronger, healthier, and better equipped to perform?... I think it is silly for people to act like yoga should only be used for meditation and any deviation is a sin. Even yoga is partially based on personal evolution, should yoga itself not evolve as well? tell me what you think

lets begin with zen

Lately, I am all about zen ( as if you haven't noticed). I like to feel all relaxed and unstressed by life. My life has been nothing but stress for years. I have worked extremely hard to get to where I am at now. I gave up friends, family, exercise, and fun in order to get through nursing school. Now that I am a new nurse in an intensive care unit I encounter new stresses that have bigger consequences. I hold the lives of people in my hands. One mistake and I could end a persons life. It is my sole purpose to protect my patients from harm to the best of my ability. I guess you could say that I have a lot of responsibility on my shoulders. Therefore, I feel that when I am off of work that life should be stress free and happy. Apparently, I am the only one who feels this way lol. Instead, I find myself collected and calm while another is stressed. Unfortunately, I end up annoyed by their stress and it ruins my good day. I just stare at this person wondering how they could be so upset about something so silly. Then, to their disgust, I suggest that they just chill and not sweat the small things. What a waste........ maybe they need to try yoga? hmmm? Got a disgusted look on that suggestion too :(
So yesterday morning I followed a yoga journal podcast. So far these have been some of my favorite videos. The videos are somewhat of a challenge yet they allow me to relax. Then tonight I tried a new video I bought from B&N, 5 day fit yoga with Suzanne Deason. I did the 4th day thinking it was the pm for weight loss version. Overall it was very relaxing although it was not much of a challenge. I really enjoyed the fact that it was slow and made me breath. All too often I feel like I need to rush through life instead of just enjoying the moment. I started this workout doing the same thing, until I realized that I was going to be in the same pose for a while. Therefore, I just slowed down my breathing and started enjoying the moment. The thing that really hit me was at the end. She suggested that everyone state a healthy intent for the day. I thought of all the things that I just cannot give up. I would like to say that I wont have another McDonalds mocha frappe but I have a serious addiction that I cant let go of. I would like to say I will eat healthy and treat my body with kindness but right now I know I would break that promise too. So I thought and thought some more about what I would be able to give up in order to make myself healthy and I came up with HURT.
I get my feelings hurt so easily by the actions of others. I dont reach out to others very often, so when I do I feel like I should get a response. Today I sent messages to several people and even though they received them they did not reply for one reason or another. Then I found that my teenage niece defriended me on facebook lol. Ya I know how trivial but it still hurt my feelings. Mainly I felt hurt because she is the type to do that only because she hates you and wants you to know it. And I'm not even sure what I did. I mean I live 500 miles away and haven't seen her in 2 years... maybe thats it? Anyhow, I decided that tonight / tomorrow I will give all that up and be happy for the love I do receive. I will breathe out the negativity and let love fill my lungs with joy :) In the midst of all that hurt I reconnected with my favorite cousins and had a wonderful weekend with my bestfriend/ boyfriend.
Last but not least... I was doing a yoga video where they talked about stretching as tall as you can but they also stated that you must be well grounded in order to get taller. That got me thinking about how you could easily apply that to life. Everyone talks about achieving your dreams and going beyond what you thought was ever possible. Unfortunately, no one tells you the magic formula to reaching your dreams. I think that balance may be the key...if you want to touch the stars you must dig your feet deep into the soil and become grounded first.Make like the roots of a tree that push further and further into the ground all the while the trunk and branches keep stretching taller and taller. A well rooted tree survives any wind that blows and every storm that follows. My yoga friends, I pray that you too dig deep and reach for the moon in everything you do. Namaste

yogaworks for someone... just not everybody

Another one hits the dust! and another one does...... I could pretty much qoute my previous review but this one was just a tad better. This time I did a yogaworks video that I actually bought on itunes for a pretty little penny. It had rave reviews once again but just like the last video it felt a little more gym and not so much zen feeling yoga. The only difference was that it actually had yoga moves and sun salutations. I was so annoyed by the video, 30 minutes into it I turned it off. The instructor kept talking throughout the entire video as if she couldn't relax herself. I thought yoga was about mind/body union? Instead, this video was purely exercise and not relaxing at all. On the upside, during the instructors constant blabber she did explain proper positioning pretty well for a video. I guess it just was not my cup of midnight tea...
On the other hand I performed yoga journals free itunes podcast am yoga this morning and was totally satisfied. The sequence was challenging, invigorating, and calming all at the same time. Which is the kind of zen tea I prefer to sip.

Alas, tomorrow is another day and maybe I will find a new practice video to quench my yoga thirst on the road.

Anytime yogonna wanna yoga

I decided to try out any easy yoga routine to stretch my body out from the torture I continue to endure after yesterdays workout. I did a quick search on itunes and found a free episode of anytime yoga. It had rave reviews about how the workout was so incredibly relaxing. All I have to say is those people must be more stressed than me( or is it Im more stressed than them?). I felt like I could have taken an elementary PE class and felt just as relaxed. The stretches were yoga based but all that deep relaxing zen was completely lacking. Given that it was a 10 minute video, each stretch lasted about 5 seconds before moving to the next stretch. So that one was a definite miss for me. If you want to have a truely relaxing before bed yoga routine try lights out crunch yoga. In my limited opinion, I find it is almost as good as going to a real studio.

I Hate Everything About you!!

Ya you... you know who you are. Within five minutes you made me want to blow my brains out and yet I still stuck around. Im no glutton for punishment! I know when its time for me to leave with the door slammed behind me. It was insane it was like you took pleasure in taunting me with my deficiencies. You threw my weaknesses in my face and showed me that Im really not as strong as I thought. Not too mention YOU caused me to look at my body in a not so flattering light. Especially when you lined me up to compete against all the others that flocked to you.... so Im going to say screw you Source Barre. You may have won this time but after I peel myself off the floor we are definitely going to have rematch.

I guess that pretty much sums up my morning. I raced to the yoga studio to get into this class that promises body sculpting results. I have no doubt that it does but I don't know if this weakling can handle this type of exercise. Its nothing like my easy going yoga that I adore. I didn't leave the place with an amazing zen feeling, instead I left with pain and defeat. I know this is something I need, I need muscles but I absolutely hated it. I think the teacher noticed because she quickly grabbed me before I left to assure me that everyone starts out the same way. I had to admit to her I thought it was pure hell, every muscle cramped and my entire body shaked. At the same time, another lady came up to share with me that she was every bit as shakey as I and that 7 sessions later I would be fine.... YA OKAY, well see about that.

A new direction

When I started this blog I really wanted to see the changes I could make with the Tracy Anderson method. I thought that having the blog would make me accountable for sticking to the program. Unfortunately my schedule is crazy and it was difficult for me to stick with the meal plan. I tend to travel alot and dont know where Im going to be from day to day. Then my workouts started slacking, my plantar faschitis flared up, and my 1 inch will power became buried with "other" more important things to do. So needless to say, I didn't finish the 30 days of TAM I had planned. On the upside, TAM helped me drop about 7 lbs and boosted my fitness level.

Fast forward to today...
I am finally done with nursing school!! That means no more studying for 40+ hours/week and sitting in class for 20 more hours. I finally have me time... sort of. I now work crazy busy 12-14 hour midnight shifts that don't allow me to sit for any extended period of time. Nor do I get a lunch break most nights. I also travel to stay with my boyfriend, most weeks, who is 2 hours a way.

Which led me to discover 2 old loves... running and yoga. He has a great running trail near his apartment that allows me to get outside and get my run on. Unfortunately, its been 100 degree weather around here, which makes running out of the question. So instead of running at night with creepers staring me down, I decided about 2 weeks ago to try out a yoga class. That was probably one of the best decisions I have ever made.

That one hour session completely relieved me of my upper back pain for for at least a couple of hours. I had been to a massage therapist the day before, taken naproxen, and still had no relief. On top of that I left the studio with a zen state of mind that I haven't experienced in years. I still dont understand all the gibberish about working through a pose and being enlightened but maybe one day I will.

Ever since that day, I have been scouring the internet, netflix, and walmart for yoga videos to practice in my own home. While doing the videos can't replace the guidance of a well trained yogi, they have allowed me to practice anywhere and anytime. The best part is doing a session right before bed in order to get rid of all that built up tension I accumulate throughout the day. I have definitely fallen in love with yoga and I crave it like chocolate. It allows me to have a few minutes of release from all aches, pains, and worries. Pretty amazing considering how simple it really is.

Today I was lucky enough to sign up for another yoga class. This time I was the only student so it was more like a private yoga session with the studio owner. She really worked with me on my postures, breathing, and flow. She even showed me the trick to transitioning from plank to chatarunga in a straight line( which is going to be one of my new goals). Then she introduced me to the yoga wall, a super slatted wall that allows you to hang super special yoga car towing straps from. First, she placed a belt around my waist and had me hang in downward dog and proceeded to place me in several different stretching positions to open up my shoulder blades. I have been pain free all day!! After watching me go through the motions she informed me that I actually have great flexibility and that I should work on building my muscles up instead. I hate to say this but she might be onto something lol. Consequently, I signed up for another class tomorrow that is a bar/ yoga class.

My new found love of yoga has inspired me to continue this blog with a new direction and goal. While there is a lot of resources out there about practicing yoga, there is very few that show the changes that a person has along the way. Today I am going to make a commitment to practice yoga every day for the next 21 days, which is totally doable. This might mean only practicing for 20 minutes but none the less I will stick with it. While such a short time probably wont change my body into SHE-RA I hope that it will give me a good foundation for setting up my practice. I want to show the world and myself how daily yoga practice can transform you from a caterpillar into a butterfly. ....Namaste


btw here is my current stats 132.6 lbs and 29.9% body fat